Thursday, March 30, 2017

Wifeless Husband Haikus

Approximately once a quarter, Tanya travels for work. When she does, I find that I am inspired to write about her and my experiences while she's away. However, since it's me, I can't write in a normal way; instead, I compose haikus. Here is the full collection to date.

Wifeless Husband Haiku 1

when tanya travels
in the pantry treasure hides
p b and j lunch!


Wifeless Husband Haiku 2

the dishes pile up
with laundry in the hamper
chores don't do themselves


Wifeless Husband Haiku (3)

australia is
a hard thing to fit into
a proper haiku


Wifeless Husband Haiku 4

slovenly living
i don't have to make the bed
and the seat is UP!


Wifeless Husband Haiku 5

five o'clock shadow
no one here to remind me
when did i last shave?


Wifeless Husband Haiku 6

this morning i feel
the west wind that brings you home.


#WifelessHusbandHaiku 7

once again, you leave
now i must determine lunch
cin'mon frosted flakes!


#WifelessHusbandHaiku 8

normally she makes
tasty salads for our lunch
where are my cookies?


#WifelessHusbandHaiku 9

should the blade be used
to tame the facial whiskers?
i think not today


#WifelessHusbandHaiku 10

your plants are in need
"add nutrients now" it says
electrolytes craved?


#WifelessHusbandHaiku 11

tossing and turning
the dryer is amaze-balls
easily amused


#WifelessHusbandHaiku 12-1

she returns today
what is the state of the house?
i am *such* a slob!


#WifelessHusbandHaiku 12-2

vacuuming, dusting,
laundry, and dishes are done
housekeeping panic


#WifelessHusbandHaiku 13

yet another trip
this time will be different


#WifelessHusbandHaiku 14

now it's eight o'clock
laundry and vacuuming done
i am still on track!


#WifelessHusbandHaiku 15

countertops are clean
what on earth is happening?!
ahead of schedule?!


#WifelessHusbandHaiku 16

thunderstorms last night
difficult to sleep again
no cuddle-buddy!


#WifelessHusbandHaiku 17

twenty-four hours
and the atlantic ocean
between you and i


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